Communication is the personal process of exchanging information and shared understanding between people. The modern world today calls for high scale effective communication skills in order to win the heavy competition in all spheres of life. Improving on communication skills is also a key fundamental in improving and maintaining good and healthy relationships.
At management level, effective communication skills are used to create an environment of open communication, short messages, recognize nonverbal signals and mutual understanding. At social level, it helps to motivate and console people.
Last month, I attended a family gathering where all my relatives were present. It had been a long time since we had such gatherings and my grandmother came to talk to me to see how I am doing. As she only speaks the dialect of Hokkien, I wasn’t able to respond much as the only few Hokkien statements I know are ‘Have you eaten?’, ‘yes’ and ‘no’ etc. Usually, another family member would be translating what my grandma said but this time round, my boyfriend who was sitting next to me gladly did the work since he is able to speak the language fluently. From the conversation, I learnt more about my childhood as my grandma described how it was like taking care of me when I was a baby. On one hand, I was glad that there was a translator to aid me in interacting with my grandma whom I know loves me dearly while on the other hand, I was quite embarrassed that I actually seeked the help of a non-family member to help me communicate with my family. From this, I was reminded of the fact that communication is essential to show care and concern, which is the foundation to building good relationship.
To have and feel the bliss of healthy overflow of emotions not only at home but workplace as well, it is important to improve on communication skills. Here are the 3 factors which I think are important to effective communication.
1. Eye Contact
Make direct eye contacts when talking to the other person. This helps convey interest and encourage the other person to show interest in your conversation.
2. Body Language
Body language speaks a lot what you don’t speak so be aware of what your body says. An example to this can be experienced when consoling a friend. By standing with arms crossed, your body conveys disinterest and reluctance to communicate whereas standing with arms free on your sides convey that you are easily accessible. Giving a slight pat on your friend’s shoulders would also express that you sympathize with him or her.
3. Speak appropriately
An appropriate volume, tone and confidence ensure listeners hear exactly what you are saying. The usage of coarse language and bad words can be taken as invective at anytime. You can avoid insult and ignorance by choosing the right kinds of words.
Benefits of good communication skills are endless.
With effective communicative skills and self development, you can achieve success and win the game of life.
At management level, effective communication skills are used to create an environment of open communication, short messages, recognize nonverbal signals and mutual understanding. At social level, it helps to motivate and console people.
Last month, I attended a family gathering where all my relatives were present. It had been a long time since we had such gatherings and my grandmother came to talk to me to see how I am doing. As she only speaks the dialect of Hokkien, I wasn’t able to respond much as the only few Hokkien statements I know are ‘Have you eaten?’, ‘yes’ and ‘no’ etc. Usually, another family member would be translating what my grandma said but this time round, my boyfriend who was sitting next to me gladly did the work since he is able to speak the language fluently. From the conversation, I learnt more about my childhood as my grandma described how it was like taking care of me when I was a baby. On one hand, I was glad that there was a translator to aid me in interacting with my grandma whom I know loves me dearly while on the other hand, I was quite embarrassed that I actually seeked the help of a non-family member to help me communicate with my family. From this, I was reminded of the fact that communication is essential to show care and concern, which is the foundation to building good relationship.
To have and feel the bliss of healthy overflow of emotions not only at home but workplace as well, it is important to improve on communication skills. Here are the 3 factors which I think are important to effective communication.
1. Eye Contact
Make direct eye contacts when talking to the other person. This helps convey interest and encourage the other person to show interest in your conversation.
2. Body Language
Body language speaks a lot what you don’t speak so be aware of what your body says. An example to this can be experienced when consoling a friend. By standing with arms crossed, your body conveys disinterest and reluctance to communicate whereas standing with arms free on your sides convey that you are easily accessible. Giving a slight pat on your friend’s shoulders would also express that you sympathize with him or her.
3. Speak appropriately
An appropriate volume, tone and confidence ensure listeners hear exactly what you are saying. The usage of coarse language and bad words can be taken as invective at anytime. You can avoid insult and ignorance by choosing the right kinds of words.
Benefits of good communication skills are endless.
With effective communicative skills and self development, you can achieve success and win the game of life.
Every Good Conversation Starts with Good Listening.
Thank you, Hazel, for this thoughtful post. I especially like the story that you use to illustrate something basic: not knowing a language can be a major barrier to communication.
ReplyDeleteI just wonder whether you can even understand your grandmother, or is it only a problem in responding? If you didn't have a translator, would it be impossible for you to converse with her?
One phrase that you use seems strange: "the bliss of healthy overflow of emotion." This might be a bit of an exaggeration, especially in the context of communication on the job!
In any case, I appreciate your effort.
Hi Hazel,
ReplyDeleteFrom this interesting story you shared, I believe you must be embarrased by all the unglamorous deed you had done during your childhood especially with your boyfriend beside you.
From all three main points, you mentioned that they are important factors for effective communication when comes to verbal contact with another person. Then how about communication without physical contact such as writing letters?
However, I love the picture you posted as this reminded me how dogs are faithful listener as they responds actively to your calling when trained appropriately.
Thank you so much for your post.
Hello Hazel =)
ReplyDeleteI especially like this point: at social level, it helps to motivate and console people. Effective communication is indeed important for the becoming of a better person. The lack of communication can really make one feel uncomfortable.
The picture is very nice. I was enlightened by what Patrick said about the picture.
Thanks for the great post! =)
Hi Hazel,
ReplyDeleteYour experience with dialect speaking relatives reminds me of mine as well. I speak Hakka (a lesser known dialect) and sadly most of my Singaporean friends cannot understand the dialect. But whenever I meet someone whom I can converse with in this dialect, it feels as if I have known the person for years.
I cant exactly pinpoint why i feel this way. One possible reason could be that the use of dialect sets a very casual tone.
I guess this is probably why some people deliberately choose to converse in dialects even though they are fully capable of having a conversation in English or Mandarin.
Ji Wei
Hi Brad,
ReplyDeleteI could understand the general picture my grandmother was trying to describe since I am able to make out simple words in Hokkien. However, I wasn't able to understand the details. Hence in this case, I know my grandmother was talking about my childhood but I wasn't able to understand the story fully. If there is no translator, I would only be able to answer grandma's simple questions like 'Have you eaten?', 'Do you want this?' and 'Do you like this" etc with either Yes or No in Hokkien.
Next, I do agree that its a bit of an exaggeration when I used the phrase 'the bliss of healthy overflow of emotion'. Thanks for pointing it out to me!
Hazel =).
Hi Patrick,
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to communication without physical contact like writing letters, the 3 factors would not be able to come to play. Instead, there are many different factors we can take note of. Here are some I can think of =).
1. How do you address the receiver?
If the person is of higher authority, you may want to address him or her 'Sir' and 'Mdm' respectively to avoid being rude. If it is an informal letter, addressing the receiver by the name shows friendliness or the establishment of a closer relationship between you and the receiver.
2. Write appropriately
Similar to the factor 'speak appropriately' as mentioned, we have to take note of the words we use and the tone of the letter. We can also use courteous words like 'Please', 'Thank you' etc when appropriate to create a good impression.
3. Usage of symbols
To avoid sounding formal with my friends, we could also include symbols like smiley face =) in the letter. This creates a level of comfort between the two parties.
PS: I love the dog picture too! Thanks!
Hazel
Hi Rebecca and Ji wei,
ReplyDeleteTo Ji wei: I guess being able to speak the same language allows you to identify a sense of belonging to the particular culture. Thus you feel closer to the person who shares the same culture as you.
Thnk you both for your comments!
Hazel
Hi Hazel,
ReplyDeleteLanguage plays an important role when it comes to effective communication. As I am clueless when it comes to Hokkien, I seldom communicate with my paternal grandmother. Instead, I am closer to my maternal grandmother as I can understand basic Cantonese. Language barrier can indeed pose a serious problem to human relationships.
Looking forward to more of your posts! :)